#24: Recent Scars August 18th, 2007
Derksen writes: “I ask the question that I am fairly certain most artists dread to hear: how much of this stuff is personal (ie has a direct bearing on your life in a tangentially autobiographical sort of way), and how much of it is just something that felt right, a fiction of the sentimental?”
For the record: all of this stuff is personal. That doesn’t mean that it’s word-for-word true, but fiction does a remarkably good job of telling the truth sometimes, you know?
I was a little astonished, today, going back and listening to how this sounded a year and a half ago. I used to actually sound like that? You people actually listened? Man.
Redeciding hourly if you’re self-aware:
All angles, eyelashes, worn-out shoes, torn-up hair,
but sometimes, with things you say,
by chance or design, but either way, I guess,
I try to catch the edge to every inside joke you make
Explicating riddles in the words you choose:
Hesitate a little, so I know you thought them through
as much as I will
And I’ve heard the others wonder what it is with me and you
Well, let them wonder more
I’ve been wrong before, but they have, too
Glitching live heartskips we both pretend to concentrate
These days, who cares?
What’s maturity, anyway,
but a string of recent scars
from each miscue that got us this far?
And I’m glad you know me well,
but I wish you couldn’t tell I try this hard